MY FORMER LIFE AS A PLAYBOY BUNNY

Yes, readers, it is true. I once was a Playboy Bunny! Hard to believe? Well let me tell you about the reality of my life...When I was about thirteen or so, I knew that something just wasn't quite right. A big dance was on the horizon and I was sweet on this cute, adorable, fascinating young girl, Cindy. In my quest for fun and a desire to capture the affections of this lass, I knew that I had to do something dramatic, shocking.

I enlisted my mother's help, who upon hearing of my plan was reduced to laughter, but agreed to assist. First, the base of the costume...MY Mother's one-piece, pink bathing suit...Then application of the puffy white tail, bunny ears, padding where God didn't provide any...AND...penny loafers, hairy man legs and attitude completed my ensemble. By now, no doubt, you've guessed the venue...The big Halloween dance at my junior high school. After shaking my tail to the howls and jeers of my friends and, garnering my share of scowls from the girls envious of my figure, it was time for the awards ceremony...Ta Da! "And, the award for funniest costume goes to...David!" I won a big, goofy looking snake, which I proceeded to graciously give to my female friend.

Those were great times, a time when a kid could be a kid, dress up like a girl, not get pulverized for it by the school hit squad; and an era in which to just have fun. I learned a lesson from watching the reactions of others when I stepped out of my more preppy dress and gender to impress. A life lesson there folks. If you dress to impress or shock, are willing to poke fun at yourself, apply some imagination and adopt a more non-traditional approach to a problem-solving, interesting things might happen. I wonder 'bout that little girl from time to time. She was a pretty, freckle-faced filly and a wonderful part of my emergence from adolescence into the wold of Playboy Bunnies and my fascination with the opposite sex. My nose is starting to twitch.

So, now you know. The story of my life as a former Playboy Bunny and the discarding of traditional roles, if only for a brief period of time...And yet, from that experience, life lessons that remain. Think I'll go munch on a carrot or two.